5 Funny Quotes From Writers With A Dark Sense Of Humor

Not all writers are grumpy and stiff. In fact, true creativity involves a lot of playing around with words. Here are 5 quotes from writers with a dark sense of humor.

1. “The downside of my celebrity is that I cannot go anywhere in the world without being recognized. It is not enough for me to wear dark sunglasses and a wig. The wheelchair gives me away.” Stephen Hawking

2. “Don’t be so humble – you are not that great.” Golda Meir

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3. “Politics and prostitution have to be the only jobs where inexperience is considered a virtue. In what other profession would you brag about not knowing stuff? “I’m not one of those fancy Harvard heart surgeons. I’m just an unlicensed plumber with a dream and I’d like to cut your chest open.” The crowd cheers.”  Tina Fey

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4. “Let me ask you something, in all the years that you have…undressed in front of a gentleman has he ever asked you to leave? Has he ever walked out and left? No? It’s because he doesn’t care! He’s in a room with a naked girl, he just won the lottery. I am so tired of saying no, waking up in the morning and recalling every single thing I ate the day before, counting every calorie I consumed so I know just how much self loathing to take into the shower. I’m going for it.

I have no interest in being obese, I’m just through with the guilt. So this is what I’m going to do, I’m going to finish this pizza, and then we are going to go watch the soccer game, and tomorrow we are going to go on a little date and buy ourselves some bigger jeans.”  Elizabeth Gilbert

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5. “I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.” Mark Twain