Navigating the troubled waters of a love relationship is a difficult process. Especially when you have to unlearn some toxic lessons we all heard at some point in our lives. Here are some common habits that you might have working against you.
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1. Calling your partner your “sun”
It might seem romantic and all, but in fact what you are really saying is that you choose to gravitate around somebody else. You erase your personality and your way of being just to make the other feel important. And if you really think about it, that’s just an attempt to emotionally blackmail the other into giving you the affection you need. Which should be given freely, not in return of your canceling yourself from the relationship.
2. Being in touch constantly
It’s true that a relationship built on communication is a strong relationship. We need to communicate our hopes and dreams, our emotions and our inner doubts. But do you have to do that all the time? Isn’t that a way to harass your partner? Isn’t calling them ten times a day a way of controlling them, of wanting to know where they are every single second of the day?
3. Expecting your partner to validate ALL your emotions
You are entitled to your feelings. So is your partner. But there’s a big difference between acknowledging your emotions and needing others to validate them. Yes, you can be angry about an insignificant event that occurred at the worst time, but that doesn’t mean your partner has to jump out of his seat to handle your emotions for you. Not every emotion deserves recognition and applause.
4. Never spending time apart
Having common interests, hobbies and values is an important key to a good relationship. But that doesn’t mean you have to do everything together. You are allowed to have other passions than your partner, to go to places they are not interested in and have social interactions separately from the couple. Don’t forget that the road to co-dependence is paved with good intentions.
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5. Staying in a bad relationship too long
If your relationship is beyond repair, you don’t have to stay, just because you’ve made a commitment at some point. We are not suggesting to quit your relationship when things get hard, but to know when there’s nothing else to do. Your grandparents might have done that, but remember that those weren’t the most enlightening years. Most of the time, sticking it out was not a real choice, but something that most people did as a result of being socially pressured into it. Please, share this!
