Being rejected is one of the most excruciating experiences we must face. Because we have to: there’s no way one can go through life without being rejected at least once. To be able to handle this experience properly you might need a bit of help. Here it is.
1. Allow yourself to be sad about it.
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It’s your right. After all, you were brave enough to take a horrific step and nothing came out of it. Play that cheesy song again and again, until you get tired of your own sorrow.
2. Don’t try to give it a positive spin.
The person who didn’t want to commit to you might have told you what a wonderful person you are, what great friends you might become and so on. Don’t misinterpret these kind words as proof that they will change their mind. They won’t.
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3. Don’t make them into a heartless bastard just to make you feel better.
They are not a bad person just because they don’t want to be with you. It’s not like they could’ve loved you and chose not to, just to spite you. Desire has a will of its own and there’s nothing you or they can do about it.
4. Don’t link the rejection to who you are.
You might be feeling awful now, but that doesn’t mean you should define yourself as someone who is going to be alone forever, as someone unlovable. It’s easy to think that if you had been a better person, the other wouldn’t have rejected you. By going down this path, you only amplify your sorrow.
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5. Be proud of having tried.
Instead of feeling worthless, you might want to realize the brave thing that you did by putting yourself in a such a position of vulnerability. And don’t forget that your capacity for love is endless. Please share this!