There is always something to complain about. But some people seem to enjoy complaining. They don’t. They act as they do because their brain works differently. And now, here’s some good news about that.
People who complain are not bad people. Their mind is scanning the environment for stressors, the hustles and the complains first. It’s how their brain is wired.
The problem is that the brain is like a single processor in the computer, it has only a finite amount of resources to experience the world. The complainer is using most of the brain resources to look for the possible causes of negative feelings and thoughts. But can we program our brain to devote the same resources to finding things to be optimistic about?
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Positive psychology studies show that if you can list everyday 3 things that you are grateful for, everything can change for the better. If you can do that for at least 21 days, you train your brain to look for reasons to be positive. The result is not only temporary, but on the long run. This pattern remains in the brain.
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In the case of depression, the problem is that the individual gets used to the idea that his behavior doesn’t matter. If you break that pattern by taking small manageable steps, you progressively take larger and larger steps. The brain is devoting its resources on moving forward, not in identifying the problems that might arise. The belief that your behavior matters is essential to your happiness. The more you learn optimism, the more the brain walks itself out of the depression. You cannot be grateful and depressed in the same time.
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In other words, you can learn optimism, as one learns to play the guitar: by practicing constantly. Training your brain can deeply influence your perspective on life and therefore the quality of life.
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