Searching for our soulmate can prove to be quite an adventurous journey. Most of us call this journey life – because life is definitely more than pay checks at the end of the month.
No matter who we are or where we are in our paths towards something great, we all crave for affection and emotional balance. We want that someone to be with us when we stumble as well as when we succeed.
It’s true that some of us are more focused on their shiny careers or any creative projects they may have. But regardless of how much we achieve in this area, we need support.
MORE: 3 Signs You Are Ready For Love
The idea of having a significant other to cuddle with and love makes it all worthwhile. So we search and we search, but what are we really looking for? What do we want from our better half?
When we’re looking for a life partner, we seek these 3 essential things:
1. Something familiar
We need our future life partner to have traits we’re already familiar with. Psychology and psychoanalysis tell us women, for example, look for someone who resembles their father – whether it’s physical or emotional traits. But also the mother and this means that we subconsciously choose a partner considering the things that we’ve known as kids.
MORE: Why Failed Relationships Aren’t Failures: 3 Lessons On Love That Doesn’t Last
So a romantic relationship would only mirror the kind of relationship we had with our parents. And we need that familiarity because our brain loves patterns, even if some may have a negative impact.
2. Someone we longed for and never had
Do you know that feeling of unrequited love which you never really got over? We’ve all been in love with someone at some point who did not respond our love or who were already committed in a relationship. We’ve hoped for months or even years that things would change, we thought they’d finally see us.
MORE: 5 Things You Can Do To Recover After A Major Breakup
That craving is still there even if you feel you’re completely over them. They had something you wanted, you saw yourself with them, but it never materialized. So you’re still looking for that very same thing in a potential life partner. You think it’s the only way you will truly stop that longing and get over this past love.
3. Someone we had and lost
When we lose someone we loved deeply, what keeps us alive is the thought that maybe some day we’ll find that which we lost. That somehow, it’ll come back to us simply because we want it with all our hearts. Somehow, we know the Universe has saved a special someone for us, someone who will stay.
MORE: 5 Types Of Soulmates We’ll Meet And Love In Our Lifetimes
Someone who is brave and won’t turn their back on us. We may have lost somebody dear and precious, but this love will be transformed. Because what we want in our future life partner is that something we had, loved, and lost.