If you are a parent, you know by now that whenever your child looks at you, he sees a superhero. There’s nothing you cannot do. In their pure minds, you are perfect in any way. Because you are the most important role model in their lives, you should be careful what you say to them.
Here are 5 things you should never tell your child:
1. Stop crying immediately!
Sometimes, our children cry for no reason. At least, for no reason obvious to us. But even if you really believe there’s no good reason for them to cry, don’t tell them that. They don’t have the necessary skills to manage their emotions. Remember that a lot of adults don’t have those skills either. By forbidding them to cry, you instill in them the idea that showing their emotions is a shameful thing. They might grow up to become emotionally stunted persons.
2. You are such a disappointment
If by saying that you want to make them feel ashamed, you are probably too late, since they already do. Try to explain them what they did wrong and why, not make them feel guilty. The idea that they are a disappointment to their parents is too big of a burden for a child to carry.
3. You are the worst
Because in their minds you know everything and you are never wrong, they will believe you. They will grow up to believe that they are garbage. And it will take lots of therapy, money and energy to change this belief. Instead, try to explain how they should act next time, what they can improve and how.
4. You are an ungrateful brat
No matter how well our children behave, how perfect they are, they will always feel that it’s not enough. They notice the sacrifices you make for them, so there’s no need to make them feel guilty. Don’t make them feel that every move they make should be a reward for the fact that you took care of them.
5. Why can’t you be more like your brother/sister?
By saying that, you make your child believe that he is not enough. This complex of inferiority will stay with him during the adult years and will prevent him to believe in himself. Not to mention the fact that it will create unnecessary brotherly rivalry. All your children need to feel equally loved.
Don’t forget that with every word you utter, you create your child’ destiny. Please, share this!