We tend to believe that people are who they are and there is nothing we can do about it. But we are also what we practice, and some mental habits can improve or diminish our well-being. Here are some dangerous ways of seeing the world that might stand in your way:
1. To not forgive others.
Forgetting is not forgiving. Forgiving is accepting that a certain situation has occurred, that we have been wronged and to liberate ourselves from the resentment that follows.
Forgiving means not wasting time with revenge, anger and dwelling on the past. If one can do that, it’s less likely to get depressed, stressed, physically sick or have low self-esteem. When you forgive you do it for yourself, not only for the person who has wronged you.
2. To not forgive yourself.
Everybody makes mistakes and that’s ok. What is less ok is to be overwhelmed with regret, embarrassment, shame and guilt in such a way that you are not able to feel worthy of feeling happy. When you are in such a mental whirl try to reason with yourself, to accept your feelings without being their captive.
3. To think it’s all or nothing.
All-or-nothing type of thinking causes panic, low self-esteem and even hopelessness. It gives you a rigid view in the world and exaggerates the negativity of events, situations, and people. Try to accept the numerous shades of grey that exist in life, since this worldview is not only truer, but healthier.
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