Everybody wants to run away from unhappiness. When we linger, it’s because we’re stuck, not because we chose to stay. But maybe there’s another way to handle unhappiness.
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The problem with negative feelings is that the more we want to push them aside, the more they cling to our heart. So maybe the solution is to just confront them.
As we realize that those dark moods are not just a passing cloud, but they are here to stay, we should try to see what is behind them. The first step is to recognize that, in spite of what we may say out loud, we are not OK. And then try to see where are those feelings coming from. We don’t have to find a fix right away. Moreover, the more we focus on finding a rapid solution, the more desperate we will become.
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Confronting our own unhappiness is not an easy thing to do. But research shows that our happiness depends on our ability to tolerate its opposite: unhappiness. The study concluded that after examining 2300 young adults. Those who reported greater life satisfaction were those who allowed themselves to feel whatever emotion seemed right to them at the time, even if the emotion was an unpleasant one.
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Expecting never to to feel sad, angry or fearful sets up an unrealistic goal that can lead only to disappointment and therefore to greater unhappiness. On the other hand, if we learn to live with our negative emotions, we will be less traumatized by the unfortunate events in our lives. Not to mention the fact that going through a negative situation and survive it will make us more self-confident. We will trust ourselves more and therefore we will make bolder and better choices, which will increase the chances of being happy in the future.
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We know that confronting your negative emotions is not easy. But at least, it’s a fight you can win. Please, share this!