For many people, there is nothing better than having a good conversation, be it with close friends, relatives, colleagues or new people entering our lives. Having a meaningful conversation is not as easy as it may sound. But we can become better at it by understanding the psychology behind it.
When we engage in conversation, we do it for two reasons: to exchange information and to create and cultivate social relationships. In other words, a good conversation is not only about what we find out, but also about the impression we create about ourselves.
More: 5 Things That Make A Strong First Impression
For a team of scientists from Harvard, the key to better communication and therefore to better social lives is responsiveness.
Responsiveness is a way of relating to others in such a way that they feel understood, validated and cared for.
According to this study, the most effective way to cover all these aspects is to ask a lot of questions. Even though it might appear risky, since we might appear intrusive or insensible, asking various and pertinent questions works.
By asking more questions we understand the other person’s thoughts, feelings and experiences. But we also validate their need to be known. We show respect for their point of view. They feel cared for since the questions show a high level of curiosity, respect and concern for the other.
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This helps not only to better know the other and to avoid unnecessary conflicts, but also to create a good impression about ourselves.
We all like to talk about ourselves and be known. But if we make an effort to be responsive to what the other has to say we might make a friend who in return will satisfy our emotional needs.
More: Loud People Are The Most Insecure Ones, Psychology Says
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